Looking Back at 2015


I'm not gonna lie to you, if you'd had asked me between February and September, I would've told you that 2015 was the worst year of my life and in reality it probably has been. It was eventful, there was a hell of a lot of low points, and most of the highlights were made in November and December, but I turned it around, and I ended 2015 in a very good place. It's been a hard year, but I couldn't help writing a post about my year because although they've completely been outweighed by negativity, the highlights have definitely been some of the best times of my life. Sorry for the negative months, it does get better I promise!

I kicked off the year going to Newcastle for football with my best friend. It was an incredible trip and we won 2-1, the day couldn't have got better. Except for having to climb like 100 flights of stairs at St James' Park to get to our seats, but the view of Newcastle was SO worth it. 5 days later I dropped out of college, definitely one of the best and one of the worst things I've ever done all wrapped into one. 

I turned 17 in Febraury, it's not that exciting but it's one year closing to being an adult. My birthday was crap and I can only hope my 18th is better. I spent the rest of the 4 months solid lounging around at my now ex boyfriends, I was probably happy most of the time but all in all; the worst decision of my whole life. I had no clue what I was doing with my life and I wasted a hell of a lot of time doing nothing but watch Netflix all day. Oh and he also slept with one of my friends, and another person, the joys.

I got a full time job, I reapplied for college, I kind of got my life back on track. I still spent 70% of my time obsessed with cheating ex boyfriend, and running back and forth between houses to try and keep our trainwreck of a relationship together. What the hell was I doing.

I got my first paycheck, said ex boyfriend threatened to leave me if I didn't buy him a PS4. Guess who bought a PS4. Guess who was played around with for the next month. I went to Go Ape, and all in all it was brilliant but I was absolutely scared out of my life and having someone pressure you to do something you're not sure on is bad, it's even worse when your 10 metres off the ground and you're scared of heights. I still didn't really have any idea what I was doing with my life.

August was a weird month for me. It started off so well, I got my act together, I took a break from cheater ex and focused on me, I went to Devon and spent time riding horses and working. I came back to Southampton for a blog meet up and it was so nice to see all the friends I'd neglected due to being in an incredibly controlling relationship, I had the best day ever sipping cocktails and chatting. My phone was going off every 2 minutes from said ex who knew I was back in town and wanted to patch things up. Guess who took the calls and agreed. I am an idiot. At the end of August, football season started again, which definitely improved the month a great deal. I had interviews for to restart college which were SO stressful, but looking back it was all worth it.

I restarted college. I hated it, everyone was younger than me and I really did consider dropping out again, but I stuck with it. The rest of the month was spent trying to patch up a broken relationship. It really was going no where. The highlight of September definitely was going to London Fashion Weekend, I rarely visit London so it was nice to have a walk around and see all the big sites. I am car crazy, so seeing a Ferrari Enzo, Lamborghini Aventador, McLaren P1 and a Porsche GT3 RS all in one day made it pretty special. The fashion show was incredible, so many beautiful trends. I'm definitely going back next year.

I FINALLY GOT MY ACT TOGETHER. Cheating boyfriend drove me absolutely mad so I left him. One of the best things I've done all year. I took a week or so to patch myself up and learn to do things by myself again, it was hard. Like really god damn hard. I stuck through it though and a few weeks later I was in a much better place. I reconnected with old friends. I went to Devon for week. I went to Liverpool for football with my best friend. I spent time doing things I wanted to do. By the end of the month I'd never been happier.

November was a tricky month for me. I hit bumps in the road. I nearly dropped out of college, again. I lost friends. In the end, I turned it around. I was positive about life and my future. I went to a gig, all by myself. After relying on someone to be there for me for so long, I was so happy to be able to do something independently. I probably had one too many vodka and cokes, Saint Raymond absolutely killed it and I met him after, not a bad night if you ask me. I ended November by taking a MASSIVE risk, I booked tickets to see Don Broco in Leeds by myself (well I wasn't planning to go by myself but I hadn't made plans with the person I wanted to go with yet, I'll update you in December).

The risk I took in December paid off, I travelled to Leeds, I saw Don Broco, I met one of the most amazing people and I'm pretty sure I was dreaming the whole time. If you follow me on twitter, you may have seen Mystery Man occur in a few tweets, well this was the start of MM. I received many drunk texts from the ex, I finally blocked him, well after I laughed at the photoshopped attempt of a six pack that he sent me, ahh what a joker. I finished a whole term of college, which I never thought I'd do in a million years because I still absolutely hate it. I went for lunch with Becky Bedbug, my number one chicka. I also ate two desserts, what a treat. I visited my grandparents in Devon for Christmas which was absolutely lovely, I went to the horses lots and spent time with my family which isn't something I get to do often as my brothers are both at uni! It's definitely been one of my best Christmas' as I'm finally starting to appreciate the time I get to spend with my family, and it was full of laughs and happiness. Boxing Day is for football, we smashed Arsenal 4-0, pretty good night to be honest. 27th meant it was back to work time, but only for 3 days as I had New Years booked off to go to Nottingham, MM is involved! On the 30th, I took the 4 hour train journey to Notts, it was boring and I really dislike trains. The next 2 days were spent laying in bed until 12 everyday, eating way too much, playing crazy golf (I didn't win), shopping and drinking my fav, Disaronno. There also may have been a New Years Kiss watching the fireworks, but you didn't hear that here. On the 1st we crammed all our stuff into his car (it was definitely a struggle, do not take an MX5 for travelling) and drove down to Birmingham for the last night, which was spent in a gorgeous Downtown Abbey style hotel; boy knows the way to my heart. The next day was spent sipping hot chocolate and taking a trip to see the penguins at Sealife, they were so cute and I definitely think one of them should've come home with me. (I know the last 2 days were technically 2016, but I really wanted this post to have a more positive ending so I just had to include them!)

See, I told you it got better! 2015 has been a hell of a ride, and it's not something I particularly want to experience again. I've learnt a lot of lessons, and I can spot a fuckboy from a mile away now. Here's to a better 2016, I have a feeling it might just be my year. 

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